If you're going to live a bigger life you can't just stop at saying, "I'll never do that again!", or "I'll never let that happen again!" The truth is, if you never take time to recognize the behavior that is causing or allowing certain things to happen, you will unfortunately find yourself in a cycle that can continue for years or all of your life. It can get to the point that one of the first things that will come to mind when people see, speak of, or think of you can be that issue or problem in your life. I don't think any of us in our right mind would want something less desirable to be someone's initial thought about us.
Since learning this valuable lesson, I have found that to get to the root of a situation or issue in my life I can't just go back to the moment it happened. Most of the time I have to track back to hours prior, days and sometimes weeks to get to the root of where a pattern was created. I may have to recognize a certain habit or tendency that I have that tends to yield the same results. Once I zero in on that root, that initial thought or decision, I become able to make better decisions at that same point another time, (because another time will come until the cycle is broken) and thus break those unhealthy and painful cycles in my life.
One of the greatest lessons I have learned is that a bigger better life isn't made up of events, but of good choices made on a daily basis that create an all around healthier, happier, more stable life.